We were standing by a small fence on the upper level of a nice backyard. On the lower level, some steps down and about 10 meters away, was Abby talking to Lety and my mom. Lety owns that great house we were in and she invited us all for coffee and what not. Eventually the conversation happened and it went something like this:
dad: So... Abby is staying at your house then?.
me: Yes... So far she's been staying there... I don't
know for how long though.
dad: And how do YOU feel about that?, Do
you want her moving out?.
me: [this was a tricky question... But I just let out
what was in my heart].
I don't want to push her one way or the other, if
she wants to stay my house is hers.
It will be her choice at the end.
dad: but what about your relationship?.
[As an older man he knew what he was talking about...
Now I know].
me: well... I am afraid... Afraid that she will become
more like my sister and the magic between us will
be gone.
dad: yes... That's what I fear might happen...
but we will see... You are both smart kids.
And then the conversation became casual again... Talking about the nice view or whatever. When we had that talk her father seemed concerned about what the deal could do to our relationship, not about living together and sinning or stuff like that. I remember that because of that "I am afraid... Afraid that she will become more like my sister and the magic between us will be gone" part. It is one thing to live together as a couple, and another to live in the same house, with your parents, in different rooms and all... The dynamic just changes. I don't recommend it to anyone.
I don't quite remember how long they were here, what I know is that I was having a very hard time making things happen. During the summer we coolant build the virtual tour through a section of my campus because it was just being built, so now I had to work on all that. Besides I was taking very hard classes... I hated school, not only were the subjects awful, my classmates were ahead of me and I was taking all this classes with a bunch of guys that I didn't know... I was almost starting to regret going abroad... I was that worried.
Anyway, the time her parents were here we had a great time, we went all over the place and they got great pictures and stories to take back. By the end they liked my parents a lot, and that was really cool. Not because I cared that much, but because it meant so much to Abby that her dad was being so caring towards her. In the past they haven't had the greatest of relationships, and now they seemed to be bonding a lot. I was happy. Eventually we took them back to the airport, said our good byes, and agreed on meeting them in a month... Yes, we were going to Abby's sister wedding.
Abby decided to stay in my house. Of course, we all agreed.
I cannot really pinpoint huge events that would prove my point... But with time things were eroding in the relationship little by little. And it's not because of huge things, it's always in the little details. But eventually we came into that point in which we were arguing more than enjoying our time together, when going out we would always find ways to disagree and linger on them all through the evening... Our relationship was growing cold in every possible way little by little.
I don't think it was her fault or mine... It just happened. Living together was burning it down slowly. You just know things are not working out when you hit the one year together mark and she doesn't want to do anything about it... When you don't even get a hand written card... I mean, it was one year!. We celebrated our first six months a lot, we were happy then... And just in case you are wondering, yes, I did give her a card and wanted to go out with her and celebrate...
The semester was flowing terribly fast... I remember going back and fort to the immigration department so that Abby could stay for a full year... He he he, that was a funny yet terribly exasperating experience, we Mexicans have the worst bureaucracy. Classes, hers and mine, trying to leave the weekends early to travel and do stuff with her, leaving some time for my friends too... argh... Chris my German friend was around... Then Lisa, a beautiful German girl who liked hanging out with me but Abby hated, go figure... Later Chris told me something that she said and I wanted to kill my self... Anyway, I am faithful -sigh-. Whatever... It was just all happening all of a sudden and I didn't know which my spot was.
All of a sudden I was with Abby in my living room having a terrible discussion... We never fought or yelled or anything like that, I am talking about quiet intense discussions, give and take, who's wrong and who's right, anyway we loose. That kind of discussion. It sucked... We were about to be leaving to Abby's sister wedding in just a few days and things were going that bad... I remember her saying that maybe we shouldn't go... Whatever... I hated that, I really didn't know what was wrong, and couldn't really see a way to fix things... She was never very good in suggesting changes, and I felt like I was juggling a late project at job, I was failing in my classes, and worst of all I was seeing my relationship fade away... I felt terrible, like I wasn't being enough in any aspect of my life.
Anyway, not quite sure about our relationship, yet knowing that, at least at that stage, we wanted to make things work, a few days later we were on a plane to Sara's wedding...
--
I don't want it to sound like all of the semester was bad with her... but while I try to think of cool moments I see that I cannot trully find good ones... they happened, but before classes started... then it became a bit mild and luke warm all the way, that when things were good.
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