There are very good days in life...

those good days, are generally so by little details that are just good times... Those good days are better just lived, and not described... Since whatever makes them so good, is hard to grasp in words...

I like those days...

And then, there are days like this fucker... Just... Not good.

And, just like in the good days, the reasons are meaningless to mention. They are meaningless because, when you write about them... They don't seem like a reason enough for things to feel one way or the other.

See?... You describe a good day, and... It can possible be read like any other day... Same now...

The problem is in how it feels. Yes... A LOT OF CRAP tend to help. Like... Not having money to pay the bills, like rent this weekend, or the bills that start to have due dates on Tuesday... That is not nice. I can't communicate with the girl I love, and in times like this, distance just sucks a lot... Everyone misses the ones they love in the good times, and wish they were around... But when it feels really bad, is in the bad times... When stuff just doesn't feel good and a hug is needed...

You learn to not take things personal, and always believe there is a good reason for the way things are going on. Trust. Etc. That is the only way something like this every works. But how it feels?.. It can still be not nice, regardless of the good thoughts.

... Anyway... I want to get rid of this weird angst... And... I think the whole money issue started it, and then I just project it into stuff around me... Heh... Where is the Taoist in me in times like this?...

Let go... And all this nice ideas?...

Heh... Damn.

Ok... Enough complaining... I need to get me a good mood. Music helps.

Cheers people,
off to find that Taoist Hector.

Pastillas para no soñar...

para variar, del buen Sabina:

---

Pastillas Para No Soñar Lyrics
Joaquin Sabina

Si lo que quieres es vivir cien años
no pruebes los licores del placer.
Si eres alérgico a los desengaños
olvídate de esa mujer.
Compra una máscara antigás,
manténte dentro de la ley.
Si lo que quieres es vivir cien años
haz músculos de cinco a seis.

Y ponte gomina que no te despeine
el vientecillo de la libertad.
Funda un hogar en el que nunca reine
más rey que la seguridad.
Evita el humo de los puros,
reduce la velocidad.
Si lo que quieres es vivir cien años
vacúnate contra el azar.

Deja pasar la tentación
dile a esa chica que no llame más
y si protesta el corazón
en la farmacia puedes preguntar:
¿Tiene pastillas para no soñar?

Si quieres ser Matusalén
vigila tu colesterol
si tu película es vivir cien años,
no lo hagas nunca sin condón.
Es peligroso que tu piel desnuda
roce otra piel sin esterilizar,
que no se infiltre el virus de la duda
en tu cama matrimonial.

Y si en tus noches falta sal,
para eso está el televisor.
Si lo que quieres es cumplir cien años
no vivas como vivo yo.

(Estribillo)

Challenged mexican-hood...

Times in Edmonton have not been that nice lately... Not anything bad in particular, just shitty rainy-cloudy weather... And it seems I really can only take so many days of this. So I have been having to deal, a tad, with a grim depressing mood... And the grim depressing idea-flow that comes to my mind with it... Heh.

It's silly, and I recognize it, but in times like this... It all seems to be somewhat bad in life... I don't like being so "weather dependant". I will see if there is a way to fix that. I mean, what if I end up working somewhere with weather like this?! I can't just be "down" all the time... People, I bet, have come to solutions to this. Right?... O.o

... Anyway. Last night I had a good time just going out for a beer with Alex. The summer is feeling weird, and there is not much social life... Huge contrast from last term, in which it just didn't stop... Heh. So we decided to just go out and have a good time. Again, Black Dog... Cool place, and we sat by the bar, and the bar-lady kept giving us beer anything the Pint was low... Very good times, laughs and talk, about whatevers... Heh.

Something funny is that, entering this bars, I am starting to have problems with my Id's... I REALLY don't look like the dude in them. And yes, "the dude" is indeed me... It's just that... Now I have longer hair, a sort of beard, and... He he he. The faces they make are just funny. One guy just saw my Id, looked and me and said "whaaaat?... come on!!!"... ** sigh ** So far they always let me in... Heh.

...

I was going to make a point with the title of my post... But now I feel lazy!... It's just that people here, really really have a hard time believing I am Mexican... 1) I am not brown enough, 2) I don't have a Mexican accent... and... 3)... I DON'T CARE ABOUT SOCCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.... And Every time someone invites me to play, or asks me about it, about the worldcup, or whatever... Heh... I really get weird faces and responses... Always along the lines of "which country did you say you were from?"...

... Oh well...

Such is life...

Cheers.

pd. I have my tickets to France. ^__^

Work work work...

My routine has been quite boring this past couple of days... Or... More than boring, just not really worth writing about... Which, my brother would say, is something to note and be wary of... I agree. In general though, it all feels good... I have this nice way to flow through my days, and although I am working most of them, it slides and doesn't feel too stressing...

I take good walks now and then, break to read a little, rent some movie, and have good times with a couple of friends when possible.

The summer is being as I imagined, somewhat lonesome, a lot of time to my self and to think. This job that I got, well, I work a lot by my self, from home and stuff... I play my music, sing along, and... Heh... Just... Am?... I don't know.

Sometimes I think about the next term and I get a little weird... It will be funny. I remember so much the beginning of last year, when I had just arrived here, it was all new and exciting, and I meet all this cool new people. And now?... Now I am one of the "old and experienced" that knows all the little corners and fun places to go... Heh... I will be the one to show this people where to go, even to buy groceries... And... Just another cycle starts... Heh.

This summer feels a little like being "idle"... Waiting for something bigger to happen. Just getting my "horses" ready for whatever is to come.

... And... Little by little, I try to just stop thinking and trust that... Whatever comes, will be good.

^__^

Anyway... I will get back to work, and get me that ticket to Europe. ;-)

Cheers peoples... And A LOT of good vibes.