Moon walks and moon talks...

I think that my previous post was pretty lame, since, to be honest, it does nothing but to describe a bunch of "blah" events... they do seem blah because I wrote in a hurry and there is no emotion to them... yet for me it's a good compilation of what went on, and thus I can remember the cool part of those events...

Yet it's nice to say that the camp was pretty cool because I got to meet this guys, and had pretty interesting talks with a couple of them. Like most international students I have know they are pretty nice people, you learn to be open like that when you are on a new country... you need allies after all.

Right now I am waiting for Sandra and Daniel to come back to the apartment, and so we can go out to a "nice jazz night"... it will be fun, I am worried because I have some work to do for the tec, but I am aswell sure that it will be done either way, so I might aswell enjoy my time... I won't sleep probably, but it won't be the last time I do that. Actually, last night I couldn't fall asleep... I have all this ideas on my mind... It's nice... I like it... but it's hard... I wasn't anxiety what I felt, yet there was enough information running through my brain that it just couldn't get into "sleep mode"...

(by the way, I went to yet another comic books store, and I found yet again a bunch of comics that you don't easily get in mexico, including a couple of sandman figures - of dream himself- and things of the sort... I wonder if I'll have any money by the end of my stay to be able to buy all that nonsense).

So monday... wow... the dawn of an old era I must say for real...

On monday morning I woke up at about 8, and took off the house with Daniel rather early, we had a very good cup of coffee in a nice coffee shoppe, and then took the bus. That bus drove me to BioWare, my 1st time in a real video game company... and not just "any" company, there is a reason why this guys get this amount of awards after all.

I was nervous and terribly excited... when I walked in there... man... that was something... as you walk in you see a stand with tons of prizes and awards, the nice lady registered me, and then daniel walked me down a corridor. To my left was a huge stand that had all sorts of books related to art, human body, architecture, writting and all those things... -those are the books we no longer use- daniel told me.

Then the 1st "office" I saw was this HUGE lounge that has a ping pong table, a pool table, 3 futbolitos, and several couches and sofas in front of a TV that has all the imaginable consoles, controles, and game cases... right next to it was the kitchen, filled with oranges, bananas, apples, muffins, an fridge filled with ice cream, and every thing was "laying there to be taken"... That, I was told, is the place they go to chill and relax from work... (at this moment I started going crazy).

At a point it all begun and so I meet the guys that are working on Jade, a game yet to be released, and some of the folks from "dragon age", which is a game that is "highly classified" and from which I wasn't allowed to see a lot... yet everything would resemble Jade's stuff sort of... I meet the "technical artists" which are a bunch of guys that make it possible for the programmers and the artists to work together, and talk to the head guy for quite a while, then I meet the game designers, the testers, the graphic programers, the senior programers, the division that programs the fights... man... TOO MUCH!!!... I was right in the guts of a video game, and not only did I get a cool "BioWare" mug, I got all this insight to what goes on right when they are building a game... man... I don't think I will be ever able to see a game the same way... probably what happens when you see a naked woman for the 1st time... he he he... no woman is ever the same again!.

I had lunch with some of the game designers and it was cool, all this guys have the terribly different backgrounds, the only thing they have in common is that they can tell a good story... (that's what a game designer does, they decide what happens when, who meets who, the quests and all that... they are the ones who make the game interesting after all). Emmanuel is a friend of Daniel, one of the designers, and a pretty interesting guy... today he gave me some time to just shoot all sorts of questions at him and ask him for professional advice, and for help... he was more than nice answering all my questions... he he he... Although he is sarcastic and you can tell he is always thinking something funny or strange, he is a french guy with a great black humor. He used to work in marketing and earn a bunch of money, but at a point decided that it was boring and so he started to do what he always wanted... video games... (AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!... GETTING CRAZY HERE!!!!).

Anyway, yesterday's visit at BioWare was a great experience... probably a life changing one. At a moment it was time for me to go home and leave Daniel to do some work... so I did and when I arrived home, Sandra invited me to the University and she gave me a tour around it. I loved it... the buildings are awesome, they have all sorts of cultural classes, the sports building rocks, libraries, labs... it's huge, yet "packed" so you don't have to walk that much between buldings... (not those 15 minutes walks like in macomb... mostly because of the cold... I am told that there are days here in which, if you throw a bunch of hot water to the air, it will fall as ice to the ground... your hot coffee just bought from star bucks will freeze in secods if you are out in the street... sheeesh... that's a little too much).

Later I went back to BioWare, just to meet Daniel there, and then we went to his Taiko class... It was sooo interesting, I love percussions my self, but this was more like a martial art. Hey had all this moves as they played... Daniel was rehearsing in a room with the "new guys", but then I went to see the more experienced ones and I was perplexed by their skill and the sound of it...

Something that sucked though is that I lost my backpack there... he he he... or at least I left it... forgot it... oh well...

After the class Daniel and I felt like watching a movie, but since we couldn't find anything nice, we went out for a beer. It was nice because there were no bars open, so we walked A LOT looking for one, which was just an excuse because the better part of the talk happened while walking. He told me some things of his travel to japan, and then we talked a lot about philosophy... man I had missed those talks with him. At some point we did find a bar and stayed there for a while, there we both came up with pretty good ideas... ahhhh... I wish I could tape those talks sometimes.

At some point we came back, talked a little more with Sandra... and tried to fall asleep... I couldn't though, yet I rested... but visiting BioWare is messing up my mind... he he he... I need to decide on several things, and it would be nice if I can do it while I am here.

Today I woke up, took a bath, and started working in the computer, at a point Daniel called and told me that Emanuel was willing to give me an hour to talk about game designing and all my questions, so of course I took the chance and went to BioWare... that's the talked that I already described in some previous paragraph)... Later we played ping pong for a while in the lounge, and I meet Jason, the senior graphics guy, who gave me a spot for tomorrow... with him I shall have a talk like the one I had with Emanuel, but about his field of specialty.

Right now I am just waiting in a computer lab close to sandra's and dan's place... thinking a lot... but mostly, deciding and getting somewhere...

**Anyway, cheers...

1st weekend indeed...

My 1st day was fun, I was tired since we went to bed after 4am in the morning, yet I was able to wake up at a decent time (about 10, he he he)... the night before daniel had drawn a basic map of the main street over here, or at least the nicest street, and so I decided to walk all the way through it and get to know the place.

I loved walking down that street, it has so many different kinds of stores... like really, from one called "decadence" that has all related to marihuana (I don't think it has the actually weed though), to ethnic stores, gothic stores, comics stores, irish, scottish, and all sort of funky places... Canadians are nice, and some girls are VERY good looking, but I would say it's average... not like what Tomas sais about eastern europe at least.

There are a lot of "freaks" walking down the street, girls with multicolored hair, gothic looking ones, and all sorts of guys too. There was a carwash in a corner that was literally filled with girls in tiny bikinis... and they would wash your car like that!!!... damn... I wish I had a car... I was tempted to ask them to wash me... but then again I am shy like that... he he he.

I walked for about 15 blocks until I decided that I wasn't going to find a place to buy candian dollars going towards that direction, that's when I just turned bank and walked into the 1st bank I saw. The guard was very nice when I asked him if I could exchange - currency in there, he said -oh wait a minute- then came back and said -it'll be just a minute - .... I waited for a little while and then the manager of the bank came and asked me what I wanted and everything, I kind of got weirded out and said "well I just wanted to know if it was ok for me to exchange some dollars here"... and all of a sudden she said, with a huge smile, "of course!, don't worry, there is no problem, we will help you... "... and so they did...

Another messed up thing is that here the pedestrians have the preference, so if you are walking ANYWHERE the cars stop... if a car is like 2 meters away from the corner and you are about to walk by, they completelly stop... at 1st I would look at them in disbelief but once I noticed that there weren't going anywhere unless I crossed the street I started doing it... which means that you can pretty much walk around everywhere without looking!!!!... because they will, for sure, stop... Daniel says that he is very worried, because he's gotten so used to it he's almost sure he will be killed by a car once he comes back to mexico... he he he.

So I walked a lot and went to a comic book store... yay!!!... IT WAS FREAKING AWESOME!!!... comic castle is nothing compared to it... I had to put my self together in order to avoid expending all my money there... so many toys, rare comics, clothing and all!!... I found a "squeak" doll, a lenore doll, a lot of clothers, so many comics... damn, I wish I had all the money to buy those things... It was fun at the store because apparently I did everything that I am not supposed to be doing... I walked in with my backpack on, I went behind the counter and what not... oh well...

Later on the evening I went with sandra to a mall to buy tenis shoes, I got a great deal and bought a sketchers pair for only 37 canadian bucks... which is very cheap!... after that we went to a super and there I met Paco, Juliana and Karla... those were some of the guys that I was going to go camping with... we bought stuff, what not... they were a nice bunch indeed.

At a point I went to Pancho's house where I met like 20 other guys, since that was the gathering point... most of them were latins, some from colombia, peru, and mexico, but there was a girl from quebec (which is like another country), a girl from spain, and a couple of canadians. We jumped into the cars and drove for like an hour till we came a cross a beautifull camping park... IT WAS SO NICE... the weather was warm and sunny, all those trees, walk paths, and it all was by a huge pretty lake... it was like a "dream site"... fiddlers green kind of... and there were camped.

The camp site had showers and bathrooms, running water, etc... so in the 1st world you always get your services even if you are into a "wild" weekend. During that day I had fun with most of those guys, helped build the tents, put on a fire, etc... that night we stayed up till about 5:00 am... singing, drinking, and having a blast... After going to bed were probably some of the worst hours of my life... I WAS FREAKING FREEZING!!!... I really was... you know how it's always colder when the sun is comming out?... damn... I was shivering!!!... still...

The next day we were all up by 10 or so, and after breakfast we went to the lake... the lake is very very larde, I couldn't see the other end in several spots, and there were a lot of trails to follow to get there which are pretty nice. A funny thing was the concept of sunbathing in Canada, and how most people was doing it... just wearing a swimsuit and laying on the "beach" getting some sun... kids playing in messed up cold water... etc... Even I got a tan... it was weird because comming to Canada didn't resemble anything like that in my mind... this was more like "puerto vallarta meets mazamitla"... yet it was a lot of fun.

Of course a lot of great talks happened... tons with Daniel, but I had a couple of good ones with other guys like Gil, Guillermo, Jose Ramon, Frederika, Rebecca, Scott, Greg... etc. It was nice.

That night was colder though, and so most people went to bed no later than 3am... but still it was a great time by the fire while we all were at it... more than 20 guys and girls close together singing stuff and telling jokes by the campfire... drumming with the "garrafon", etc. At the end there were only 5 of us (gil, memo, greg, rebeca, rocio and I) who stayed up till after five... we had a blast telling all sorts of jokes.

The day after we all had to wake up early and put the tents down etc, because we had to be out by 12... (really, like in a hotel)... so we did, and then went over to "the beach" to have one last time in there... at about 4pm we came back.

Daniel, Sandra and I were so freaking tired... but still, we managed to get showered and in the mood to go out for dinner... and so we went to a great thai place they have in town... spicy exotic food!... yay!!... of course, that night we stayed up late talking. Daniel showed me all his pictures from his latest trip to Japan... wow... those pictures were so neat, but even better was the story behind them all... ahhhh... the world is such a huge place, I WANT TO SEE IT ALL!!!...

Argh... so that was a huge "summary" of the weekend... he he he... honest, that's what happened... how I felt?... ahhh... that should be discussed on a post of it's own... let's just say that my mind is working non stop for real...

** cheers and love... take care

1st weekend...

comming up next...

of how nice canadians are, girls in bikini washing cars, and camping with the international folk by a pretty cool lake...

travel rants...

(originally written by hand...)

It's almost fear, one of those times in which you feel a lot, but cannot really tell what's going on inside... adrenaline rush... of course it's not the 1st time I've flown across the country or taken a plane, but still it's always the same... the feeling of walking through those gates that separate the "loved ones" and the ones that are going away. Walking down the aisles, looking for the proper gate.... and then... the waiting.

Some people sleep it over, they may not really be tired, but they just numb their anxiety by sleeping and this separating themselves from the comming reality... they are "leaving on a jet plane", such an innatural thing if you ask me... still, they have managed to convice us all that it's feasible, so we believe... and so it can fly.

I wonder what else could we do if we could just believe on it collectibly...

... Always hated saying goodbye... that's why I didn't do it with most people in my life... I said goodbye with a hug to my mom, dad and my brother... that is always bitter sweet, I know it's only for a couple of weeks, but still, there is always "that" eerie feeling, that just doesn't let me let go that easily.

(I miss my computer... a keyboard, writing by hand is o much slower... looks kind of cool though, but still).

The waiting room is pretty much empty, I was planning on sending a bunch of text messages through my cell phone to a bunch of people, but there is no reception here... I bet it won't work in Canada either... I will use it as a watch at least. (I don't like having things around my wrists).

... I don't want to stop writting, because it's the one thing that is keeping me sane... awake. But I will because I am not making any sense... I'll try and read or maybe "sleep it off" just like everyone around me.

-----------

The plane got, after all, filled... yet I don't think it was such a great acomplishment since it's one of the smallest planes I've ever seen. When I saw it I though it could probably make it to Puerto Vallarta or some place close like that... but houston?... man I am kind of having second thoughts about it...

So far I've had cool conversations with a nice old lady (there is always one around) and which a cool girl that felt the same way about the size of the plane... he he he... it was fun to talk about it... now let's see how the darn thing flies.

------------

After a while the little guy did it... I believe there was some turbulence at a point, and they served some kind of meal too, but I trully couln't tell since I was asleep most of the time. (I guess I didn't miss that gb game after all, right alex?).

Now, arriving to another country is always fun, but it's even better when you get to houston at 8:30 and your next plane leaves at 8:44!!!!... now that's exciting.

You have to go through customs, inmigration, get your luggage, put it somewhere else, and then RUN LIKE CRAZY in one of the largest airports in the world... (gasp.. gasp... damned asthma!!)... but I made it!!... yay!!!... (gasp).

This plane is so much larger, does feel like a plane...

-------------

There is something about flying at night that I just love... all those flickering lights down at the ground... people, lives being lived. I focus in a point and see a dad getting home after work, in another an angry woman is yelling at her husband, and right over there is a party with a bunch of teens, one of them wants to declare his love tho the girl in the couch... but he won't... (sigh). There are some sad lights too, for some reason I know there is an uncle molesting his nice right there, and over there a grown man is crying like a child, holding the hand of his dead father next to a bed in the county hospital. But such is life and such is humanity.

When isee all those lights from up above I unverstand why God made us, we are so amusing. And aswell I can't stop thinking that, just as a bunch of cells make an organ, the lot of us make a larger system. Being a part of the system makes it hard to tell which is it that we are, but I just know it. Just like my liver's cell aren't aware that they are part of my liver, and they just "are" as best as they can, I think we humans just are... I wonder what we are though.

It's hard to fall asleep knowing that there are so many lights to feel... during the day youy see an "earth" colored ground, with greens and browns all over the place... it's at night when our prescence becomes apparent, coloring with bright lights places that would other wise be surrounded by darkness.

------------

Yay!!... I made it to edmonton!!!... new country!!!...

Leaving on a jetplane...

Tons of things to do... going to Canada tomorrow...
must work... finish things up...
keep going!!!!...

Funny how my mind works...

Yesterday I was playing cuban dominoes, there were 4 of us, and I am amazed at how my brain relates thoughts ideas and memories, all of a sudden I remembered about the other time in which I had played that game with only 4, and that was waaay back in Russ's house. (Russ is Abby's dad, Abby used to be my girlfriend)... he he he... and then I started thinking about the 1st time I meet him, and man... I couldn't help but smile. It was my first "meet the parents" experience, and it was quite heavy to be honest... he he he... since I was going to stay in their house and all.

Anyway, I wonder what triggers certain thoughts and memories... and it they are "stored" there all the time, or maybe some "idea" makes them be "formed" in out brains... like... are my memories stored somewhere?, or just enough info to rebuilt them when required?.

One other thing that was discussed was the possibility of starting our own sect... he he he... after a while we came to the conclusion of just starting some group or people interested in studying metaphisics and things of the sort, and share thoughts and ideas. Later on, if we find some interesting truth and path, then we may go forward with the original plan... (he he he... jk... ?)

So in a couple of days I am going to Canada, and I have so much left to do that I just don't know how in earth I'll manage to do it... anyway, we will see... and it will, of course, be solved. My life just gets terribly tangled up and for some odd reason, at the end, it all works out... in the meantime though, I give my self the chance to be all stressed out.

he he he...

**cheers!!

Rainy days and productivity

I am again living one of those stages in which I can pretty much go on and on with just a couple of hours of sleep everyday... which is good because I get a lot of things done, but I just know it won't last... he he he

Anyway, the other day something happened that, to be honest, makes me wonder about starting to work right now. The other day I was inking this page, being happy about it and all, and all of a sudden it started raining, some thunders... the usual things in Guadalajara in this nice time of the year. So, what happened was that the day after, when I tried to open my file, I couldn't!!!... IT WAS MESSED UP!!!... at the moment in displayed no errors or anything, but I thing some lightning or the ups and downs in the current messed it up... and yes, I lost like 8 hours of work... sucks huh?

Life is going fine... money issues like usual, but life is looking brighter on that side everyday... ixp is starting to pay, there are some projects comming up... ahhh... man... time goes by so fast!!... I can't believe I am going to Canada the next week... dude, I am so afraid, I am living so many things undone and unfinished... anyway, I'll get the best out of this trip, and once I am there, I will trully enjoy being there...

Ah yes!!.... in comics I just read the DNA manga, which is quite good and fun, and the 1st book of Promethea... WOW... you ought to read it... the art is good, but the story telling and the writting rocks... allan moore is sooooo THE MAN... And is deffinitelly a treaty about magic and the power that we all have within... I will deffinitelly try and collect all of the books. (and I am reading sandman again... wow too).

So cheers... I'll try and get some work done... he he he

ps. by the way, I am using the IXP dial-up service and it is indeed much faster and better than the regular one!!... yay!.

Messed up bloggin issues...

I am tempted to delete the previous post, but I won't because it's quite amuzing... just know that the "real" post is before that one. I don't know why but blogger messed things up and it posted the thing twice, but once with some entry by some other person... he he he... I will just leave it there because it's funny... but believe you me, I've written none of that.

So my reald post of titled And so the story ends... can be read after right after the messed up one... ok?...

**Cheers.

(I only wish I could know who's blog got mixed up with mine, and if theirs his/hers showed the same messed up results than mine...)

And so the story ends...

So again it happened, that a great book is finished reading and it's magic is, althought still lingering in my self, starting to fade away... It always happens with good books, you can't stop reading them, and craving to get to the end, but again, you can't stop feeling down once you've done reading them... you wish they could go on forever... like that moment of a sweet kiss, or the smell of a hot cup of chocolate.

But as everything they end... and eventhough they wait there on the shelf to be read again, and they will, it's a fact that life goes on and their magic, as great as it was, is not really a part of our "real world".

I just finished reading "American Gods", a book by Neil Gaiman. And by the feel of my words you can tell that I liked it, and I disliked the fact of being thrown away out of that magical world once I stopped reading what weutes before I need to get to work ? 6:30 am wakeup makes me be in bed by 10
The stereo in my car ? a crackly FM modulator for the ipod works, but it?s not the same
The stereo in my house - though this altec lansing speaker set for my ipod actually sounds ok in this little apt, they?re no substitute for big floor speakers and a 15? powered sub.
A fat steak and a bunch of beer on Thursday night at Outback ? don?t miss going to work on Friday after that though
Crawfish ? I can?t remember when crawfish season ends, I hope it?s still around when I get back
Southern words like ?y?unt-to?? and ?aight? - yeehaw
Having a 5 minute drive to work ? this goes hand in hand with the whole not having to wake up early thing
A king size bed - they call what I have here a king size, but it?s only a double by American standards
That amazing machine that washes your dishes for you ? apparently they haven?t moved into the 20th century over here yet
Not having to bend over to get something out of the fridge ? the whole unit over here comes up about to my neeples. Which I guess is somewhat good since I have so little storage space, I can keep stuff on top of it
Air conditioning ? screw an office that?s 85 degrees
My car ? I could put this one in every other line, it?s torture driving a diesel ford focus station wagon
TV ? though I don?t have TV at home, at least I can go next door and watch it. I?m wishing I had taken up the offer over here to get a TV, even if I would only have 4 channel

And so the story ends...

So again it happened, that a great book is finished reading and it's magic is, althought still lingering in my self, starting to fade away... It always happens with good books, you can't stop reading them, and craving to get to the end, but again, you can't stop feeling down once you've done reading them... you wish they could go on forever... like that moment of a sweet kiss, or the smell of a hot cup of chocolate.

But as everything they end... and eventhough they wait there on the shelf to be read again, and they will, it's a fact that life goes on and their magic, as great as it was, is not really a part of our "real world".

I just finished reading "American Gods", a book by Neil Gaiman. And by the feel of my words you can tell that I liked it, and I disliked the fact of being thrown away out of that magical world once I stopped reading what were the last few words. Yet I thank the chance that I had of peeking into that magical place for while it lasted.

American Gods is a must read, and to be honest, you enjoy it even more once you know something about world mithology... still, you can just go ahead and read it nonetheless. I must confess that I prepared my self for this book, and before reading it I read a lot about classic and nording mithology, and a little about world folklore, etc. Once I read those things I read couple of other unrelated books... (I guess that's when I read Borges and those guys). Still there were a lot of references that I didn't catch, but it's nice to see "familiar faces" in such odd cotexts of our real world.

What is it about?. About Gods, and what they are doing nowadays in a land where they are hardly ever remembered, and even less frequently taken seriously. The story of a regular guy that finds himself trapped in very unregular circumstances, and somehow ends up being the guy who runs errands for some Gods, and who, by the end, does quite more that his share for the divine folk.

Read it... you won't regret it... the only possible "side effect" is that you won't be able to see the world again and you used to, and magic will be in every corner wheter you like it or not.

dreaming...

I love that period of time right before falling asleep... the one that comes as you wake up is interesting too, but there you start getting back into the real world, and somehow you control it.

But no, that time before giving in to morpheus is another story... actually, I always try to remember when was it that I just fell asleep and, to be honest, I can't... minutes before I remember, but the exact time in which I lose my self into my subconscious is always too blurry.

Still, when I am still conscious, I know that my ideas are messed up... the way I perceive reality changes a lot, all my senses get confused. I wonder if they don't know wether to focus on "the real thing" or the world to come once I close my eyes for the night.

A couple of days ago I remember waking up, getting some alerts on my radio and calling back a couple of people, I started planning my day, doing this and doing that... and then, all of a sudden, I woke up for real... and I was there again on my bed... my radio had no alerts, and no be honest I didn't know if I had called those persons or not... how late it was, or how much I had planned of my days... that happens a lot...

I tend to blend those realities...

And eventhough I like both of them, I really really love the feeling of being "inbetween"...

**cheers

Yay!!!....

As for this very second, if you type "hector padilla" (the "quotes" are not neccesary) in google, my link is the one on the very top. yay!!... I really don't know how google gives the "spots", but I'm there... so there you go "hector padilla's" in the world... I am #1!!!!... he he he... at least for a while... it works with "hector loco" and things like that too... :-P

Anyway... after those seconds of "ego"... have I comment already about the "Venom" comics?... well, they are quite good. Actually it's a story about the bad guy, and you follow his lead... in a way you get to empathize with him, which is messed up... And, as far as I know, it's the 1st comic that I've read that focuses on the bad guy... kind of.

What I liked is that the story is good, and a lot of the work is done by mexicans...a least the art work... the pencilers, inkers and colorist have been mexicans for most of the issues!!!... yay!!!... (now skottie is the penciler in the current issues, but I love skottie so it's ok)... there is something about great comics by mexicans that just make me smile!!... he he he.

Damn... I know I have a lot to share, but now someone really really wants to use the computer... anyway, life is good... it has a decent smile at the moment. :-)

** cheers

ps. And now, here is another poem by Mario Benedetti... (that guys rocks)

Pasatiempo

Cuando éramos niños
los viejos tenían como treinta
un charco era un océano
la muerte lisa y llana
no existía.

Luego cuando muchachos
los viejos eran gente de cuarenta
un estanque un océano
la muerte solamente
una palabra.

Ya cuando nos casamos
los ancianos estaban en cincuenta
un lago era un océano
la muerte era la muerte
de los otros.

Ahora veteranos
ya le dimos alcance a la verdad
el océano es por fin el océano
pero la muerte empieza a ser
la nuestra.

Viceversa

-Mario Benedetti

Tengo miedo de verte
necesidad de verte
esperanza de verte
desazones de verte.
Tengo ganas de hallarte
preocupación de hallarte
certidumbre de hallarte
pobres dudas de hallarte.
Tengo urgencia de oírte
alegría de oírte
buena suerte de oírte
y temores de oírte.
o sea,
resumiendo
estoy jodido
y radiante
quizá más lo primero
que lo segundo
y también
viceversa.

ps. you gotta check this guy out.

Red skies that freak me out...

Once I slept in my brother's room because there were like 3 guys in mine, so I ended up sleeping in his floor... (one of those "anime/video games" nights I bet)... the thing is that I saw that he leaves his blinds open, which somehow "iluminates" the room with whatever amount of light the stars and moon are willing to offer at the time. I liked the idea, and ever since I've been doing it too... you not only get embraced by the moon light, but you aswell wake up early when the sun is up there... kind of nice and cocky if you think about it...

Anyway, last night I couldn't stand it... I had to close those blinds.

The sky was red... a real bright orange with a twist of red, and I couldn't really tell why... for some odd reason I just couldn't fall assleep at all... and the color of that sky kept freaking me out... are we talking about energy issues?... maybe... sometimes I am sentitive to those things... but man... I had to close those blinds... and read and read to distract my self from the real world... books are good... and whenever you've had enough of them you can close them... not like real life.

So that was then...

Now I am happy and working, and I just read one of the best comics I've read in a while... I can't believe the writter, he's a genius... and the art rocks!... he he he... it's terribly funny and smart. The name is "I feel sick"... check it out if you can... it will be worth every cent, and minute you invest on it.

Anyway... keep on working.

**cheers

feelings...

feeling down
and feeling sorrow,
wonder when's comming tomorrow,
in rainy days of self,
it's all despair...

life my friends has a way to resemble a rollercoaster... but not one of love, but one filled with all sorts of emotions, tremendous turns and it's huge amount of ups and downs... am I feeling down at the moment?... not really, just thoughtfull... I still struggle a lot with my parents, and I know for sure that I am not even close to what they'd what me to be... the thing is that I don't want to be that hector...

I am feeling rather happy with the way my life is going, but I see how it conflicts with my parents, and damn... that sucks. This next week I'll see if I can find a spot in between... one way to be ok with them, and fine with my self... you know which is the saddest part?... It's about the money... the same problem... just money. If I was making lots of it, I don't think they'd be worried at all...

Anyway... we'll see... if anyone knows of a part time job around the area, let me know... I could make things happen with one of those... but full time?... oh man... not full time... that would kill all my projects... all the things that I know I want for real...

We'll see.

**cheers.

Lots of unwritten words...

The last time I wrote in this things was like... what?... two weeks ago?... damn... he he he. It happens all the time!, when I have the best things to say, I have the least time to write them down...

What have I been up to?... a lot!... putting my life together and in a great balance, doing all sorts of things to make all sorts of things happen, in everylevel of my life. It's all good, and I like that... Working out, hanging out with friends, a lot of work, comics, and even a better relationship with my parents... "successful people are the ones that have no free time, but give themselves time for everything"... he he he...

The new project I am into is called IXP, is a company that provides internet services (ISP), e-commerce and an increasing number of services... and I am starting to make some good money out of it... in dollars!... :-) yay!... (if anyone clicks there, and is interested write me an email, I can give you all the details, and if you are interested we can make things happen for you too).

Still making webpages and flash stuff to get some cash, and working on comics harder everytime... karaokulta is experiencing a couple of problems, people related, which is good, because companies grow from those. One of the issues with creative teams is that, after all, everybody has a very different "take" on the final product, and we all have to learn to be flexible and accept someone else's work... anyway, I know it will work out.

Aswell working a lot in several things... helping that shelter with sick children... and having some great talks with a couple of friends... Every day I realize how powerfull we all are, and how we tend to use that power against ourselves... if we could all believe in what we dream of... we'd be living a whole different kind of life.

**Anyway cheers!... I miss you blog... he he he... but keep in mind that I do think of you often...

bye there.